sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
