Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
