O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
