HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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