Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
