do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
