i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Randomize
