On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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