they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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