I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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