Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
We need to rekindle our bromance
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
