We're facebook friends in real life
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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