I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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