Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
