i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
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