i love accidental penises.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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