if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
