she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
