We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
