we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
