I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize