This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
