I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize
