It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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