I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
