He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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