sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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