I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
