what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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