OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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