My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize