It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
