if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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