just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
smell my finger.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize