I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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