I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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