You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I party with great urgency now.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
