Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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