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• (858): View more from California

  Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (325): View more from Texas

  Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice

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• (914): View more from New York

  I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.

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• (585): View more from New York

  Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?

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• (850): View more from Florida

  She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.

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