this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
