all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
