great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
