I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
her facebook's as public as her vagina
She's like a pop up book from hell.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Every concussion has its silver lining
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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