I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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