guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
