are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
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He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
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You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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