You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
