I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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