apparently the secret to your success is patron
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
