so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
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Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
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What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult