This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.