I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
