i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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